Choose Forward
There are only two ways you can go. Forward or backwards. If you try the apathetic option of neither, others will be passing you. Apathy also gives you plenty of time and some momentum for building a downward spiral of negative thinking. Therefore, still is backwards. Choose forward instead. It’s a simple concept and completely within your (unlimited) power, but sometimes it’s tough to do…
There are different ways to define ‘winning’ the mental side of the game. My summary is “to give your best effort one step at a time, accept whatever happens, and do it again.” This does not mean that behavior needs to be perfect, but it does mean that when behavior is lousy once, that will not directly lead to more lousy behaviors. Avoid the negative snowball effect! Resilience is mental toughness!
Do you appreciate getting knocked down in life? It seems like an odd question, but mental skills improve with practice, just like physical skills. If you want your skill of resilience to increase, you need adversity so that you can practice dealing with it effectively. Most people laugh when I ask them if they are glad they "failed," but you really can learn to be relentlessly positive. Adversity (bad stuff) is also good, so focus on what you can learn, then move on. Michael Jordan said it was because of the 26 misses he had with a chance to tie or win the game in the last second that he succeeded. He did not succeed in spite of those misses, but because of them. Adversity makes you better, but only when you choose to use it properly!
In which direction do your patterns of thought send you? Are you in a “slump” or overdue? Do you focus on the fact that life isn’t fair or the fact that life is full of wonderful opportunities? When you are hurt, do you avoid the situation that could lead to that pain repeating, or do you courageously learn whatever you can, get up, and go for what you want again? Avoidance of pain is normal. Are you normal? Do you want to be? Do you want to lose as many games as you win? You wouldn't have read this far if that was the case. The suffering we endure and respond to positively without knowing if a positive outcome is even possible absolutely makes future victories more exhilarating. Think about this because it's true: things tend to work out best for the people who make the best of the way things tend to turn out!
Martin Luther King, Jr. said, “The true measure of a man is not how he behaves in moments of comfort and convenience but how he stands at times of controversy and challenges.” It’s true that character is revealed through sport, because sport will provide the adversity to test us. Who on your team is mentally tough? Do you have the resilience to thrive in a tough, selfish world full of unlimited forms of adversity?
Of course you do. But wait, you say, you’ve fallen short of this goal in the past? No worries. No regrets. We all have. You are not the same person now that you were then. You cannot change the past, but you can learn from it! Accept reality, forgive yourself for being imperfect, and move on. Don’t ever expect perfection, but always go for it anyways. The present is within your grasp. Grab it. Choose forward!